Blog Reflection !!!!

At first when Ms. A told us we were going to have to do a blog.  I was kind of upset thinking to myself.  I am not a good writer and now I am going to have to share with my classmates and allow them to see my weakness in English.  Now I know that I had difficulties trying to get use to the site by posting blogs and responding to people.  But once I got use to everything.  I really enjoyed this assignment.  I am even thinking about starting a different blog and expanding on this idea.  Maybe a relationship blog or something that interest me.  I honestly think this has been great therapy for me too.  Sometimes I think people bottle up there feelings and never release that frustration.  I was able to do that with this blog.   I also think that it has made me a better writer and my thoughts flow more easily since starting this blog.  Yes, at first it was hard for me to remember to blog everyday but once I got into the groove of things, this was probably one of my best assignments I have had.  I would have never even attempted a blog if it wasn't for Ms. A.  So I do think that keeping this project going for me will help me for the future.  I know this summer went by fast when you cram sixteen weeks into eight weeks.  But this was a great way for me to expand my writing and be more confident in how I write.  I hope you guys still follow my blog.  The name might change but it will be very interesting for the rest of the year.

Taylor's Gift!!!!

So today watching the Ellen Show.  There was a story on there that touched my heart.  It was about a girl that was thirteen years old and on Spring Break last year she passed in a skiing accident.  Her mother was on the show talking about how they donated her organs and how they have met 3 out of 5 recipients.  I was very moved by this story because this thirteen year old made a decision so young in life that got me thinking.  Yes I agree to being an organ donor when I go to the DMV and get a new drivers license each time.  But the mother was saying just because you agree to that does not mean that you will be an organ donor.  There is a website www.taylorsgift.org.  You than register with the state you live in to become a national organ donor and than it is on record that you can choose whether or not your organs go to a donor or research.  I am happy to say that I am now a national organ donor.  I choose the one that is a organ donor and whatever doesn't not match the people will go to research.  Now I am 34 years old and just now becoming a donor I believe there was a reason for me to turn on the TV this morning and hear this young girls story.  She is a true hero.  She saved a man's life that had been on dailies for 40 years by giving her kidney to him.  I truly think everyone has a purpose in life.  Yes, she was way too young to loose her life, but at least this young girl expressed her opinion to help others to her parents.  My heart goes out to her family and think they are just wonderful kind people.  They know some where in the world there daughter lives on.

Blogs!!!

So at first when I heard that we were going to have to start a blog,  I was kind of scared because I had never really even thought about a blog.  I have always been very private and not wanting to share with the Internet world everything that is going on in my life.  Now after we have been doing this for the last month I have come to really enjoy blogging.   I honestly have been thinking about starting a relationship blog or something fun to keep my writing going.  Yes I know that I am not the best writer in the world.  If that was the case I would be writing novels and making tons of money.  But I have been in relationships and have pretty much have gone through the bad and the good with men.  That I have some great advice to share with the world.  I realize now that I am not the only one that goes through hard times with guys.  Someone in the world is going through the exact same thing.  I recently watched Julia & Julie and got inspired that this girl decided to start a blog just because she was not sure where her life was going.  She was in a standstill in life.  She never realized how many people she was helping by starting this blog.   If I could just help one person with my experiences that would be worth it.  Just an idea. 

My Life!!!

Life is funny.  If someone would have told me I would be going back to school and pursuing a career in Nursing two years ago I would have laughed in there face.  I went to college when I was eighteen, but like most kids my age.  Having too much freedom made me travel down a path I wish I could change.  I only last one year in school before leaving the college.  I always told myself I just wasn't smart enough to make it through school.  Really I just never applied myself and focused on what was important.  I thought parting and socializing with friends was more important.  In the back of my head I though oh I will find my future husband get married and I wouldn't have to worry about school.  Oh was I so wrong.

I now am so proud of myself I went back to school last fall.  After being out of school for fifteen years I scheduled my classes.  I took Anatomy and Physiology.  Now I did not have any help with my school schedule.  That is one thing I would tell OTC to change.  I think that as a new student coming in they should sit down with a counselor and plan there school schedule.  Fall was very hard for me to get back into the school routine.  I was scared and doubted myself.  One day I called my ex boyfriend and told him I couldn't do this and thought about quiting.  He than told me to stop crying about it and just do it.  He wasn't so nice about it but that is what I needed at that time.  I think I was listening to everyone else when I would tell them I was in A&P.  They would tell me that is how the weed out the stupid people.

So I stopped listening to everyone and focused on my school.  I have never been so happy before with my life.  I ended up with a B in the class.  Yes I really wanted an A but after talking to my counselor the second semester she was shocked that I made a B from being out of school for that long.  I look at things differently now.  I want A's in all my classes and want to do my best.  If I could have just applied myself back than like I am no.  Life is just so crazy sometimes.

My Friends !!!!

I have never really tought about how wonderful my friends are.  I remember back when I was in High School my mom told me that the friends that I had then would probably not be in my life when I got older.  I never really thought about it.  I just thought she was crazy and these people would be there forever and I wasn't going anywhere so why wouldn't they be. 

A year later I found out my dad was being transferred in his job from Joplin to Springfield to run the main company.  This was the end of my Junior year of high school.  I had just made the Cheerleading squad and had became captain.  I was devastated that I would be spending my Senior year with people I didn't even know.  Well my mom made some huge sacrifices.  See my Popo aka. grandpa was very ill and she couldn't leave him because she was the closest child he had living near. 

So my parents sat me down and we came to an agreement that after selling there home in Joplin that they would rent a place and my mom would stay with me through the week and travel to Springfield on the weekends with my father.   So helping out my parents I decided to graduate school at the end of the semester and start college early.   It actually made since because I was very close to the class that graduated before me. 

So off to Springfield I went in December.  I enrolled in school at Southwest Missouri State University.  I took my general education class and I was going to Psychology.  I wasn't even 18 yet but sat down next to this guy named Ryan Climer.  He was a very nice looking guy.  Later we ended up having a project and we decided to be partners.  He came over to my house and asked me if I had a boyfriend.  I said no and he replied so I have a chance.   I never will forget that and neither will he.  We have been friends since than he is now married to one of my best friends Angela and have two wonderful boys and a little girl on the way.  My mom was right I do keep in contact with some of my old friends from back home but it is crazy how one life changing decision will bring you someone that will be in my life forever.

Stressed!!!!

So with Finals week approaching.  I really am feeling the stress today.  I am taking two classes this summer.  CIS 101 and Eng 101.  Looking at everything I have to do this week has just increased my stress level from 10 to 50.  I am panicking because I keep thinking when do I have the time to get everything finished.  Maybe it's just me but wow I am on overload right now.  I am really looking forward to July 28th.   Than I start to think about next semester starting up so quick and I get stressed even more.  I guess I just need to take everything day by day and maybe that will be easier.  I really hope everything works out well for me.

The Sun will Shine Again!!!!

So today was not a great day for me.   I happened to look on my ex's Facebook page and found out the girl he is dating are now in a relationship.  I don't understand people sometimes.  How can people say they miss you and than not even two weeks later be in a relationship with someone else.  I feel like I have wasted some great years on him that I can never get back.  I thought he was my one true love.  He obviously didn't feel the same way about me.  I think he wants me on the back burner.  Doesn't want me to have anyone but wants to play around with everyone.  So going forward I decided that this person shouldn't be in my life.  I have blocked him from my phone and closed my Facebook account.  All I can do is put one foot in front of the other and move on with my life.  I can't allow this person to effect my life anymore.  I am a good person and deserve a good guy that can see that.  I can't wait around hoping that he will change or even grow up.  People only change when they want to.   Maybe now I realize we were from two different worlds and I wanted different things.  It's time for the sun to come back out and shine on me for awhile.  Hoping for the best and trying to stay positive.  God has a plan for everything right?

Dating!!!

Ok so I had been in a relationship for 2 years.  We finally ended everything 7 months ago.  It has been hard to put myself back out there because I cared for this guy a lot.  I honestly thought he was the one.  Well that wasn't true at all.  So my friend talked me into online dating.  Which scares me.   I finally went out with this guy.  Of course I had to have my friends sitting in the restaurant to make sure nothing crazy happened.  Oh the worst date of my life.  We had nothing in common and I have to admit I was really quit and didn't talk much.  Everyone told me to just go and put myself out there.  I have to admit I feel worse than ever because I don't think I was ready and shouldn't have listened to my friends.  I just kept missing oh whats his name...

Whale Wars

So lately I have been addicted to this show on Animal Planet called Whale Wars. I am very suprised to learn how horrible these Whales are treated from the Japan whaling fleets. I guess because I am from the United States I was unaware what these people do with the Whales. I am so impressed what these people do to risk there lives to protect these beautiful creatures. I am a huge animal lover but I am more fascinated with creatures from the Sea. When I was younger I wanted to be a marine biologist, but that is hard to do when you live in Missouri. These people that are protecting these animals are just like you and me. They have real jobs but once a year when the Whales migrate to breed they take off and try to stop these whaling ships from killing them. They put there lives in danger. My hat goes off to these great people. I am honestly thinking about looking this company up and donating money to this great cause.

Shopping with my Mom

I love shopping with my mother.  Today we went to the mall.  I was helping her find a few dresses for her trip later on this year.  Now her trip isn't until November but when you are going to Hawaii you have to shop now because you can't find summer things here in November.  I am not going to lie I wish they were taking me but I get to babysit there two dogs.  Yeah for me.  Just kidding I am happy that my parents are taking trips now that my dad is retired.  I think they should enjoy there time together.  Of course shopping at the mall you don't really find anything.  I don't know who the buyers shop for but everything is just weird.  We always have good bonding moments at the mall.  I always tell my mom everything.  I am sure she knows things about her daughter that she doesn't want to know.  I love are shopping times at the mall.

My Place

As I imagine this place, it takes me back to when I was 16 years old.  My father, who recently retired from Harry Cooper Supply Company.  The company once every two years would plan a company trip to take there customers.  The customers that spent the most money there would be treated with a trip.  I always thought that was amazing to do for your customers.  After my sixteenth birthday my parents surprised my sister and I by telling us that we were going to the Bahamas with them on this trip in December.  We were so excited, we had never been there before let alone we had only been in Kansas so we never really traveled as children.  It seemed like forever before December rolled around.  Finally the day was here.  We lived in Joplin at the time and had to fly out of Springfield.  Since my parents had to go a week early and they couldn't take us out of school that long we came down the next week.  I remember clearly when the plane landed the smells of the ocean.  We all packed up on a bus that drove us to the most beautiful hotel I had ever seen.  And still think out of all the hotels I have been to it is still the best.  I would say it was 20 stories high but every floor was lite up by a different color of the rainbow.  It was magnificent.  The employees were all dressed in white and looked very sharp.  You could hear island music everywhere.  If I could travel back to any place it would be there.  

Rain

Last night I  had decided I was going to go to the pool today.  I got everything accomplished yesterday.  Around 1:00 am I kept hearing what I thought was thunder but it was happening so often that I thought just maybe it was the workers working on 65 highway.  See I live so close to the highway that you can hear everything they do, from blasting to even the siren when they back the trucks up.  You know that annoying beep beep beep.  Than about 2:00am I saw it this beautiful bolt of lightning.  Now I wasn't outside saw it from my window in my bedroom. It was bright and expanded like a spider web.  Than came the rain.  It was raining so hard.  I didn't think much about it.  Went back to sleep thinking that this morning would be clear and sunny.   Sometimes the best sun is right after the rain.  It clears everything out of the air.  But unfortunately I am stuck inside today because it is still raining and it looks like the pool is out for the day.  I guess my grass will appreciate the rain.  I usually have to mow my yard twice a week.  This year it died so early that I rarely have to mow the yard.   I guess there is two good things that have came from the rain.  My allergies feel a lot better.  I have had a dull sinus headache for the last two day and it just kept getting worse.  You never know how hard it is to do homework with a headache.  So my allergies are gone for the day at least.  So that is a good thing.  Oh well maybe the pool tomorrow.

It is Too Hot!!!

I had so many plans for today.  I was going to do some stuff outdoors.  I went out early this morning and over did it.  I have a horrible headache.  I hate it when it gets this hot outside.  It doesn't help that I am trying to cut back on soda pop.  So that isn't helping my headache.  I can't even focus today.  Maybe I will just go to sleep early and hope for tomorrow to be better.

Sunday's Blog

Today is just a lazy day.  One of those days you do not want to do anything.  I am not feeling up to par today maybe that is why or maybe it is the heat.  It is so hot to have any energy to do anything.  I have to start working out again and today was going to be the day and of course the heat advisory put that on the back burner.  Oh well hopefully tomorrow I will get up at 7am to go running.  Hopefully I don't over sleep. 

Saturday!!!

It's a beautiful day outside.  I am getting ready to leave for a day at the lake.  I hope it stays nice out and isn't too hot.  I love being on the water in the Summer.  If I could have any wish I would live here but have it be 80 degrees all year round.  I know some people love winter but I hate staying inside.  I would rather be outside any day. I am very tired this morning but I am not sure why that is I went to sleep early but I guess I was to excited to sleep.  You guys have a great weekend.

Reality TV

What has happened to all the good TV shows.  Why is it that every time I watch TV the only thing that is on is reality TV.  I remember as a child being so excited for Saturday morning cartoons.  I would wake up early in the morning and drag my blanket to the couch to watch Saved By the Bell.  A few weeks ago I kept my niece for a few days and the shows she was watching just made me think.  Everything she wanted to watch was reality TV.  I remember watching The Cosby Show, Growing Pains and My Two Dads.  They always had a message in the shows, about life or how to be a good person.  There were always lessons you learned walking away from the show that made you feel good.   There are no good shows out there that show the meaning of how to become a good person or right from wrong.  Now kids want to watch reality TV.  Don't get me wrong I watch some reality TV just to get a good laugh, but seriously do people think letting there kids watch the Jersey Shore is going to teach them something.  It's going to teach your child how to make a fool of yourself on national TV and you will get paid to ruin your good name.  I know I read an article a few years back on Lauren Conrad she had a reality show on MTV.  She was saying how it was all staged they even had writers on the show.  I think what this new generation needs is some good wholesome shows and not the reality TV.

Facebook vs MySpace

I recently heard some news that shocked me.  Justin Timberlake now own a part in MySpace and will be on the creative team to rebuild there reputation.  It got me thinking.  I had MySpace and still do even though I haven't been on the site in a few years.  I was thinking how MySpace was so much more than Facebook.  You could create your own style, kind of like a blog.  You had your choice of music, pictures, and different backgrounds that showed your own personal style.  Where facebook is the lazy way out.  There is nothing you can do to change your own personal style.  Basically you are stuck with what ever the creators of facebook chose for you.  

With Justin being there face of MySpace I was wondering how well that will do.  I am not going to lie I love the guy he is extremely talented and seems like everything he touches turns to gold.  I know in my family a few of them have already gone onto MySpace and updated there account.  They have said that they are going back to MySpace because of Justin.  I really hope MySpace has a great return and take over the facebook world.  Good Luck to MySpace.

My Heros

When I sit down and think back on my life.  I know there are two main people that I would call hero's.  My mom and dad.  They have always been a big impact in my life.  Now I know friends of mine always say, wow don't you think your too old to let your parents control you.  I have never looked at it like they are controlling me.  I have always went to my parents on advice or what to do in situations.  I know they have more experience in life and might have encountered the same problems I have been going through.  I would love to end up like my parents when I get older.  They have been married for 39 years and that is really rare these days.  I think that is why I am so scared of getting into a relationship.  Because my values are when you get married there is no easy way out.  Things are difficult at times but if you loved that person once you should fight to keep it.  This day and age someone does something wrong and it's off to the divorce lawyers.  Now I am not saying cheating is OK.  I am saying that when a person just gets upset that they aren't getting there way they get a divorce.

My dad also has the best work ethic around.  He was head of a company here in Springfield for 43 years.  The man never once called in sick and when he had vacation I would always see him working from home.  I admire him and I am glad he taught me how to have great work ethics in life.  He also taught me that your word means everything. 

Casey Anthony Found Not Guilty

Around 1pm today I heard they found Casey Anthony not guilty.  I am not sure how others feel on this matter but this is how I feel.  So if I upset anyone I apologize.  My heart goes out to that little girl Kaylee Anthony.  I am not a mother but I do not understand how you lie about your child being missing for 30 days.  In my heart I do believe that she did something to that child.  Casey just seemed like she never really cared that her child is gone.  If that was me and I did something to my child the guilt alone would have killed me.

I was watching and after the read the verdict her parents walked out of the courtroom.  But if I was her father I don't know if I could ever speak to her again.  After all the horrible things she said about her dad it was like she was trying to throw her father under the bus to save herself.  If that was my child saying those things about me I don't know if I could ever look them in the eye again. 

I know that if she really did do that to Kaylee she will get what is coming to her in the end.

4th of July

I am home from a long weekend.  I hear fireworks outside my house.  To be honest I use to love them as a child but wow they start to get old after awhile.  I know when I was a kid I loved to set the loudest ones off but I am just waiting now for midnight so they aren't shouting them off anymore.  I know I sound so old but when they interrupt my sleep I start getting a little upset.  I feel like I could sleep for a week and not wake up.  Not really, maybe a good 8 hours of sleep will do me well.   I had to miss a day of blogging because I didn't have the Internet connection down on the lake.  I do not know what we did without the Internet.  I honestly felt lost because I wasn't able to check on what was going on in the world away from where I was.   See where my parents live in the middle on nowhere I am lucky to get 1 bar on my cell phone.  So I usually get hate mail from my friends saying I am ignoring them when I get back home.  Well three more weeks of Summer school I hope I finish well this semester...

The Weekend at the Lake

This weekend was a great weekend.  My family has a house on Table Rock Lake.  It was a great trip.  We took my niece out on the boat and she loved it.  We always have a great time.  But this year was very different are whole family came down from Kansas City.  So it was very crowded, but having us all under one roof for the 4th of July was fantastic.  We had a cookout took the boat on the lake and watched the fire works at the Kimberling City bridge.  Wow that was a fantastic weekend.  Back to school only three weeks to go.

Credo

I believe that life is what you make it.  You can choose to be happy or depressed.  I choose to be happy.  I have been down that road before where you don't even want to wake up.  I was so depressed.  But when I actually realized what was making me unhappy I than woke up and I am the only one that can create my happiness.  Not my family, friends, or the man I loved.  I tell myself everyday that this is going to be a great day and nothing nor someone will ruin that day.  I had to make a lot of changes for the better.  I have a great life and nothing will stop me from enjoying life.  It is way too short.

The Casey Anthony Case

So this morning I was watching Court TV and the Casey Anthony trial was on.  I know a little about this case but haven't been following it closely.  This morning as I sit and watch the case.  I was listening to her lawyer's try to turn this around on her father.  It shocked me that here is his daughter that is on trial for killing her beautiful daughter wither it was an accident or she did this out of cold blood.  To save herself she is trying to say that it was all her fathers doing.   The baby fell into the pool and her dad covered it up.  Now I understand her father was in law enforcement and knows the law.  If this was an accident why would they try to cover it up.  To me I don't know how someone could hurt there own child.  Maybe she is mentally ill.  Than it was funny to me that a prison guard at the jail was saying how the first time when they thought they found the remains of the little girl and said the street address to Casey she laughed and went back in her jail cell.  The second time when the actually did find the little girl and told her the area they were looking she broke down and had to be taken to the hospital.  If this girl was innocent don't you think you would be an emotional wreck.  I am not a mother but I do know if something ever happened to my niece I would be searching every where for that child.  My heart breaks for that little girl and I hope her mother would just tell the truth.  No one will ever know what really happened but maybe someday she will come clean with her story.